I am worn out friends. Between caring for a sick child, being sick myself and trying to finish the second of two book proposals, I am tapped out. The good news is that the proposals are both done and have been submitted. Now I wait. I've never been very patient. Wonder if that has something to do with why God would call me to participate in an industry where you do a whole lot of waiting. Funny Lord. HAHA right back at ya! (And I mean that in the most reverently possible way)
I do want to share one thing with you. It's a little message God spoke to my heart.
Sunday my husband decided he wanted to track down a friend of his. This friend was in our wedding. I became friends with his wife. We all used to hang out when we lived in Chicago. Then they moved to Ohio, then to England and then back to Ohio. In the meantime, we moved to North Carolina. We lost touch after our move here. They were going through some stuff and probably going to move again so she couldn't provide me with a number. Life got busy. Rick and I went through our own trials here in NC and well, six years went by. So Sunday, he asked me to get online and see if I could find his friend.
I found him. And I found something else I was not ready for. His wife died in July. Forty years old and a mom of four. Dead. It hit me hard. Ladies the enemy had her fooled. He made her feel alone. He made her feel like no one knew what she was going through in life. He made her believe her only comfort was to be found in the bottom of a bottle. She believed his cocktail of lies and it killed her. It tore apart her family.
What I struggled with was that I didn't know if she ever accepted The Truth, my Jesus, the Christ. Then I wondered if I had talked about Him enough, presented Him enough when I had the chance. I fear I did not. I will not accept the guilt the enemy has tried to place in my heart and mind. And he is trying extremely hard.
What I will accept is the responsibility to not be ashamed of the gospel. I will acknowledge that as I was deciding if I was even going to submit those book proposals, I wondered if I really wanted to write and not have it marketed toward the Christian market. I liked the idea on the one hand but I also wanted to be a "Christian writer".
Ha! God clearly pointed out to me through the sad news that I am a "Christian writer", whether I write for Christians, seekers or the completely unchurched. Apparently, God was telling me with those book proposals "Yes, you do want to submit those proposals. I have called you to write for people like your friend, who don't really know me. Do you intend to go where I have called you?"
Yes, I do.
Do you intend to go where He has called you?
Be blessed friends! And be a blessing to someone everyday.